I thought I would begin Level-3 with a reminder that you should always try to be in tune with your partner’s arousal level and match your foreplay appropriately to meet her arousal level. I do a lot of slow teasing as my primary arousal technique, and teasing also involves denial to some extent. Denial in foreplay can be intentionally not doing what you know your partner desires as a means to heighten her arousal by prolonging the “suspense”.
But this reminder also comes with a friendly warning and some advice. There is a good chance that you will stimulate your partner enough during Level-3 foreplay games to actually give her an orgasm (whoo hoo!). If you are playing denial games as part of your foreplay then you will need to decide whether to edge her (back off when she is near to orgasm), or keep going (release her into orgasm). You also need to be careful to balance the stimulation, and denial because too much denial can be disruptive to your partner’s arousal.
My advice is to try to follow a basic communication rule with your partner. The rule I use is that if she says “I’m going to cum”, then it is probably ok for me to back off my stimulation (denial). But if she says “I’m cumming” then regardless of where I thought we should be in the game, I will now help her to have the best possible orgasm I can give her (release). My lady friends have always found this rule to be intuitive and not at all complicated (compared to BDSM games where you might be trying to remember a “safe word” when you are in excruciating pain).
So on that note, let’s get into Level-3 with the understanding that we may not make it to the end.
Why is she still (partly) dressed?
Did you notice that my partner still has her bra and panties on from Level-2? Did I mention that it was mostly to help me remember rule-1 (slow down) and prevent me from getting carried away during Level-2 playtime? (ok seriously the bra/panties were also reminding me to stay away from her breasts and vagina as part of my teasing game).
Well all restraints are off now so let’s get her fully naked!!!
Tease her some more
I begin kissing her again, and caressing her neck then begin to work my hand down to her chest and the run my flat palm firmly down the center of her chest then over her belly, then as the heel of my hand contacts her pubic mound I press firmly before sliding my hand over her inner thigh. Oops I missed again (heh heh). From a teasing perspective: As my hand passed over her chest it increased her desire for me to touch her breasts, then as my hand moved down her belly it increased her desire for me to touch her vagina (especially when I pressed on her pubic mound).
I repeat this a few times until my partner is undulating against my hand in rhythm to my stroking and kissing. (I find this nearly as stimulating for me as it is for her). Then I gradually begin tracing circles around her breasts caressing her lightly through her bra (while being careful not to directly contact the area over her nipples). For bonus teasing points I caress her breasts in circles beginning from the outside working my way in smaller circles towards her nipples… but always missing the nipples (heh heh).
Off with her bra!
I repeat a few variations of stroking her head, neck, chest (including breasts but not nipples), stomach, pubic mound (but not vagina), and thighs until I am (finally) ready to take her bra off. I slide my hand around behind and feel for her bra snap (hopefully she is wearing a typical snap that I can easily unhook).
Note: I pride myself on being able to release most bra snaps with just one hand in only 1 or 2 seconds. On the rare times that I struggle I try to defuse the situation with a bit of humour by either beginning to yell for help in a panic, or by cursing these contraptions for not coming with instruction manuals for dummies like me.
Taking my partner’s bra off is also a form of release (both physically and mentally). It is a physical release because bras tend to be constraining so just the removal can feel stimulating to her breasts, and also mentally stimulating because her brain is looking forward (expectantly) to what happens when the bra comes off. But I’m going to play some more denial games to continue raising her sexual tension.
Saying hello to my lady’s “ladies”
I like to give my partner’s breasts (her ladies) a soothing caress once they have been released from confinement. I basically repeat the soft circular strokes that I made when she was wearing her bra, but this time with skin on skin for a much more intimate sensation. I will continue to avoid her nipples and once she becomes accustomed to the touch of my hands I will switch to my (dry) lips and caress her breasts with an even lighter touch (hopefully sending her into shivers and moans of delight). There is another teasing trick I like to do with my mouth which is to run my (dry) lips lightly over her breasts directly towards her nipples, but open my mouth wider (the same width as her nipples) just as my mouth passes over them (missing the nipples).
If I am feeling really naughty then for bonus points I pause when my mouth is directly over her nipple then snap my teeth together loudly as if I was trying to bite her nipple off (being very very careful to ensure that my teeth do not make contact). Many ladies are (pleasantly) startled by this and some have even told me they feel an electrifying jolt pass through their bodies because of their heightened arousal and sensitivity.
Breast Relief
Ok, now I have practically teased my partner to the point of screaming I am ready to give her some breast relief (or breast release). I start by caressing one of her breasts in circles then slowly begin to grasp her breast more firmly (a bit like squeezing a balloon) with her nipple jutting outwards towards my open mouth. I give a couple of very light teasing tongue flicks across the tip of her nipple, then swirl my tongue all around the nipple before finally engulf the nipple in my mouth to suck/swirl it as I squeeze and massage her breast with my hand.
Note: I want to be very clear that except for the introductory quick tongue flicks I am no longer teasing at all, and my breast worship is intended to be a release from all the pent up frustration I have built up in my partner from teasing her. This will be reflected in my partner’s reaction because she will likely sigh deeply when I do this. Also note that I am making full use of my tongue now because my partner is at an appropriate arousal level for (lots of) tongue stimulation.
Breast worship
Now that I have allowed my partner to “release” a little, it is time to start building her up again. I am mostly done with teasing for now because my restraint at this point has dissolved to the point where I am not even capable of limiting my activities. I begin worshiping my partner’s breasts by running my hands over them in broad sweeping arcs and firm squeezes in rhythm to my passionate kisses. I frequently switch between kissing my partner, and running my tongue over her nipples and squeezing her breasts (I struggle because my mouth cannot be both places at once so this part of the playtime can be a bit chaotic).
Ideal working positions
During breast worship I might be lying on my side with one of my thighs between her legs pressed firmly up against her crotch so she can grind herself against me. Or I might be lying flat on top and gently grinding into her crotch with my erect penis (I’m still wearing my underwear). Better yet, I might be crouched over her supporting most of my weight on my knees (leaving my hands more free to roam) with my dad-belly pressed tightly against her crotch. Our bodies will fit together better if her knees are raised up. This exposes her crotch area and makes for better angle of contact between me and her (whether I am pressing on her with my belly or my erect penis).
Note: This is one (of many) examples of where a “Dad” body is more suited to pleasing a woman than a “fit” body. Imagine trying to press up against your partner using a “6 pack belly”, which is hard, flat, and will not naturally change its shape to match her curves!
Time to move down!
Once I begin to recover my composure a bit more and am better able to control myself I begin a more patient and measured delivery. I alternate my mouth play between licking and kissing her nipples and placing firm kisses (and the occasional light bite) on her breasts and all over her entire chest. If I want to get back to some teasing I keep my mouth focused on kissing while I resume stroking my hand over her chest. I subliminally signal to her that I am “going down” by running my hand over the center of her chest and slowly move it downwards across her belly but this time I do not tease her by missing her crotch.
The Pussy Hug!
Instead I let my fingers slowly bend downwards following the curve of her vulva as my hand continues sliding down until the heel of my hand is resting on her pubic mound, and the rest of my hand is lightly cupping her vulva. Then I completely stop moving my hand while applying just a light pressure on her vulva.
Note: This is called a pussy hug and is one of the simplest but most powerful foreplay techniques in my arsenal. You could say this is an example of “less is more” because I am literally doing almost nothing… and yet most ladies find it very stimulating. The pussy hug, and pussy massage are explained in a lot more detail on other pages if you want to read more.
When I am giving a pussy hug I typically try to give lighter more sensual kisses to help set the mood and allow my partner to naturally begin to focus more on what she is feeling “down there”.
The Pussy Massage!
In most cases my partner will begin to (unconsciously) undulate slightly against my hand which signals to me to begin letting the pussy hug evolve into a pussy massage. I begin to gently match her undulations by gradually pressing the heel of my hand more firmly against her pubic mound. Then as her undulations become more urgent I begin undulating my hand against her vulva matching her undulations. (Sex Nerd Sandra shows this very clearly in her pussy hug video).
I also begin kissing my partner more passionately as her undulations become increasingly more urgent, and squeezing her vulva more firmly until my partner is moaning and grinding on my hand with unrestrained abandon. This is a pussy massage (not covered by Sex Nerd Sandra’s video so I guess I can claim to have named this one).
Note: Some women will actually orgasm at this stage, so just a reminder to pay careful attention to your partner’s arousal level and try to decide whether to back off and resume teasing, or help to release her into orgasm.
Side Story: I recently gave a woman a pussy massage which only lasted about a minute. I was just starting to get into it when she suddenly grabbed my hand, looked at me urgently and said “Fuck… me… NOW!” (Yes of course I stopped foreplay at that moment… who could refuse a request like that???)
Her panties are still on?
Oh, and speaking of teasing did I mention that I still haven’t taken my partner’s panties off yet? They might have become soaked during the pussy massage (sorry darling), and if they have then I might remove them and move on to more intense games. But if they have not then I’ll do a little more teasing first. I begin to very lightly run my fingertips over the inside of my partner’s thighs starting just above her knee and working my way up to her crotch where I lightly run them up and down her vulva (through her panties), before crossing over to her other thigh and caressing up to the top of her other knee. I do this a few times before eventually lingering on her vulva where I begin stroking more and more firmly until I am eventually back into a pussy massage. During the pussy massage, remember to occasionally push firmly on her pubic mound as part of the natural rhythm of the massage.
Pussy hug in reverse?
For bonus points I may go down and play around with my mouth some more before removing her panties. I will run my lips around her inner thighs, and maybe run them lightly over her vulva. I might even do a “reverse” pussy hug. This is where the heel of my hand is at the bottom of her vagina, while my fingertips are on her pubic mound. (If my face is down there my hand is already upside down so a “normal” pussy hug is not possible). So I press firmly on her vagina with my hand while continuing to run my lips over her inner thighs adding some occasional biting and licking. Oh and an “added bonus” of the reverse pussy hug is that I can massage her pubic mound with the tips of my fingers while pressing with my hand and nibbling with my mouth (woo hoo!)
Get her panties off NOW!
Ok, my partner is probably growing a bit frantic from all of the attention she is getting down there, so it is time to give her a small “release” by (finally) taking off her panties. I’m afraid I don’t have any special techniques, or teasing games for taking her panties off… I just get it done as quickly as I can. But now that they are off, and she is feeling some release/relief I do have one more naughty teasing trick. I smile at her mischievously as I slowly lower my face towards her crotch, then blow gently over her thighs, crotch, and lower belly. This often sends shivers over my partner’s body.
The Foreplay Finale
Now that my partner is fully naked it is time to give her aching pussy the proper attention it has been craving. But since I am such a tease, I’m going to take a detour and start at the top again. I either engage my partner from a sideways stance (with my thigh between her legs), or from a crouched stance (on my knees with my belly against her pussy and her knees pushed up high) then begin kissing her passionately and stroking her head and neck. Our bodies are undulating firmly against each other in rhythm to our kissing as our arousal levels continue to increase.
Eventually I begin my path downwards. I use my fingers and hands to alternate between tracing light sweeping arcs over her breasts and firm squeezes. Meanwhile my lips are also gliding over and between her breasts in unison with my hands occasionally going in for a lick, a suck, or a bite. I may have my thigh between her legs pushed up tightly against her so she can grind on me, or I might be laying on her with my Dad belly pushed up against her crotch so I can grind into her (my preference). I subliminally signal to my partner that I am continuing downward by kissing her firmly directly in the center of her chest then slowly begin working my kisses downward. As I reach her belly I begin sweeping my lips over her belly in broad arcs, and as I proceed downward I like to nibble and lick the area just below her navel (belly button).
Hello Kitty
I’ll have to shift my body once or twice as I move downward. As I approach her lower belly I form a cradle by moving my hands under her bum and pushing her thighs wider apart with my upper arms which fully exposes her pussy. I take another opportunity to blow gently over her lower belly, inner thighs, and her pussy making her shiver, sigh, or both. I begin very lightly running my (dry) lips over her taking a teasing route from her inner thigh, over her pubic mound, and back over her other inner thigh. I make a few passes over this route, but each time I go more slowly over her pubic mound applying firmer pressure. Eventually I stop on her pubic mound and apply very firm pressure while slowly rocking my head from side to side, then begin planting firm kisses over her pubic mound.
Teasing the Kitty
My teasing technique for my partner’s pussy is the same as for her breasts, in that I am very careful to avoid the most sensitive part (her clitoris, and even her inner labia). I shift my hands out from under her bum and place them on her inner thighs so I can push them further up, and wider exposing her even more. I very gently begin to run my (dry) lips up and down her inner thighs almost contacting her outer labia (this is a very sensitive area). I gradually use more firmer pressure until my lips can no longer slide smoothly then I begin kissing and lightly biting up and down her inner thighs near her outer labia. If the lower part of her bum cheeks are exposed I may suddenly surprise her with a firm bite on her bum which usually draws a gasp of pleasure. I may also begin to firmly plant kisses from her upper thigh down to her pubic mound where I begin to bite and suck firmly on her mound. I like to pull some of the skin from her pubic mound into my mouth and run my tongue firmly over her skin while also biting lightly (I appreciate ladies who are trimmed or shaved for this part).
Wet Works
She is aroused enough now that I can get very serious with my tongue with no risk of tickling her, so I get really busy. I begin to firmly lick the crease between her outer labia and thigh working my way up to her pubic mound where I lightly bite and lick, then back down the crease on her other side. When I reach the bottom I give the bottom corner of her butt cheek a firm bite and sometimes suck on it as well. I might also “accidentally” brush my lips over her vulva while making these rounds. I gradually allow my tongue to cover more and more of her outer labia as I move up and down but am still very careful to not contact her inner labia. This should be making my partner almost frantic to get contact on her most sensitive parts. Now that her inner thighs and outer vulva are wet with my saliva I take one last opportunity to blow gently over her… sending her into shivers (and hopefully moans).
Note: As an older man I cannot spend too much time in this position (basically my head tilted up at a sharp angle), without getting a pain in my neck eventually. Once I begin oral sex I usually spend up to half an hour down there so I need us both to be as comfortable as possible. This is a good point to stop briefly and get both of us into better positions for the “main dining event”.
Almost there now
After giving my partner a shiver blow, I pause for a moment and smile at her. She is probably expecting that I will finally kiss her where she wants to be kissed. But instead I get up and stand at the side of the bed, then grab her ankles and pull her towards me until her bum is right on the edge of the bed. Then I grab a pillow and throw it on the floor (for me to kneel on), and grab another pillow and help her place it under her head (so she can comfortably watch the show).
Note: Remember the rule about interrupting foreplay activities. Her arousal level has likely dropped just a bit so it would not be appropriate for me to dive straight into her pussy and start licking. So I rewind my play slightly to bring her back to the right arousal level.
The home stretch
I push my partner’s knees up high, then straddle her (intercourse position) allowing my penis to very lightly rest on her clitoral hood. Then I take her head in my hands and start to kiss her very slowly and sensually while gently pressing my penis against her clitoral hood in rhythm to our kissing. I normally still have my underwear on at this point but sometimes I have taken it off and my penis is in direct contact with her vagina.
Very important notes: If you are not wearing your underwear now, and need to wear a condom during intercourse then your partner may not be comfortable with your bare penis coming into any sort of contact with her vagina. So only do this technique if you are confident that she is ok with it. There is also a lot of trust involved in this move because when sliding your penis over your partner’s vagina it is possible for it to enter her (either accidentally or intentionally). Do not ruin your sexual encounter (and possibly your relationship) with your partner by making this mistake. You have been warned!
Going down for the last time!
As I passionately kiss and caress my partner our passion will build again and eventually it will be time to move down again. I start by sliding down just enough so that my penis stops touching her clitoral hood and replace this with the “erotic pressure of my Dad belly”. Then I use my hands and mouth to slowly caress, suck, kiss, and lick my way down to her belly until I reach her pubic mound again (I won’t repeat the details because we’ve been through this already).
Hello Kitty (again)
I don’t play around much this time. I apply firm kisses, bites, and licks to her pubic mound while I reach up to knead and squeeze her breasts in rhythm to my mound kissing. I work my way around her pubic mound and into her thighs while still missing her clit (sorry but it’s not quite time yet). I do a few “laps” around her pussy using just my lips, then do a few more laps adding lots of tongue contact. Now I might lick the crease between her thigh and outer labia from bottom to top, and cross over her pubic mound a few times. I might also push her knees up to her chest and spread her legs wide (depends how flexible she is) and kiss and nibble her ass cheeks a bit (sometimes I go in for a bite).
Dinner Time at Last!
I bring my hands down and place them firmly under her bum and squeeze while lifting her upwards slightly to subliminally signal to her that it is dinner time! But I have to give her one last tease. I slowly and gently blow around her whole crotch area (which should be wet from my kissing), and watch her shiver. Then I stop and look her directly in the eyes to let her know it is finally time. I might even ask if she is ready (yes I know stupid question). If she hasn’t screamed at me to eat her pussy by now she is certainly thinking it.
Release the Tension!
I make sure my tongue is good and wet and then slowly go down to her pussy while holding eye contact. Then I will either flick my tongue ever so lightly across the protruding bits of her inner labia, or I will place my tongue just into the crease of her inner labia and slowly glide my tongue up from the bottom to her clitoral hood which 99% of the time elicits some moans of relief (as in finally he is getting to work). I run my tongue up and down her inner labia a few times tasting her juices and seeing her response. She will probably be arching her back and grinding a bit now and usually moaning.
Get to Work!
Next I might switch from gliding my tongue up and down her labia to rapidly fluttering my tongue side to side while gently moving up and down her inner labia. When I get to the top (clitoral hood) I will trace some circles around it and gently suck on it. I might put my whole mouth around her clitoral hood and swirl my tongue lightly fluttering in loops, spirals, or any other pattern that feels good for both of us. Some light suction will help to puff up her clitoral hood and her clit which also increases her arousal and sensitivity. I usually massage her pubic mound with my hand while doing this and if she is not too sensitive then I sometimes expose her clit more by gently pressing on her mound then gently pushing upwards. I usually moan a bit at this stage because I am getting turned on by her getting turned on.
Mix it Up!
After a few minutes of this I briefly stop for some air. I could have pushed her over the line at this stage but it is still much too early. I might say something to her when I stop like “Oh my god you are making me crazy”. Then I might blow gently across her wet crotch before going back in to start the whole show over again. I again start with very light touches with my tongue and might start running my tongue up and down her inner labia. I might push a bit more insistently with my tongue putting it as far as I can inside her (one of my biggest oral regrets is that my tongue is wide and short rather than long and narrow so I can’t reach very far inside). I might do some nibbling and chewing around her outer labia and pubic mound. I might run my tongue over her ass cheeks and bite them, or up and down her inner thighs and bite them. I might get back on top of her and glide my wet penis up and down her inner labia crease… this time making lots of contact with her clit while heavily kissing her (and telling her I am going to fuck her… later).
The point is to keep mixing it up and seeing what she enjoys the most. Getting her close and then backing off is called edging, and it can make her orgasm much stronger when it finally comes.
Is it Sex Yet?
Some people consider oral sex as foreplay, while others consider it “full on” sex. Regardless of your definition I think you would agree that by this point we have reached the end of foreplay. Personally I love to give my partner her first orgasm orally so I would continue with down the path of oral adventures from this point. I have other pages related to sexual techniques including oral sex, and intercourse so I hope you will take the time to explore these pages as well.
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If you think any of my information is incorrect, or can be improved please do contact me. My sensual journey is far from over and I am always looking to learn new things, or improve/correct things I thought I knew.