Yab Yum!
Never heard of it? Skeptical that a position with this name exists? Well it is real, and it is one of my favourite positions for sensual intercourse.
Yab Yum is an ideal position to get into after your partner has just had an orgasm (or several orgasms) if you want to keep the action going but she needs to recover a little. As you can see it is a great position for slow cuddling and kissing, and you can still stimulate her because you are inside her.
The reason I (and hopefully my partners) like this position so much is because of the level of intimacy that is possible. Yab Yum provides the face-to-face closeness of missionary position with all the hands-free contact of cowgirl. In fact your bodies are so close together and your hands are so free to roam that this position is like “making out” with the added benefit of penetration (whoo hoo!)
Bedroom Contortion Act?
As you can probably imagine, this can be a challenging position to get into if your partner simply tried to climb on you and get you inserted into her. In fact the first time you get into this position you might try to thrust in and out of your partner and find that you can barely move. Which will make you wonder what is this position even good for.
Ok, first I’ll help you get into this position then explain how you can actually move around once you are in it.
It’s actually easier to transition into Yab Yum from Cowgirl because the positions are similar except in Cowgirl your partner is kneeling with her feet under her, but in Yab Yum her feet are out in front of her.
To get into Yab Yum position your partner simply needs to bring her legs forward. Easier said than done? Yeah I’ve seen ladies struggle with this… so here’s the trick. Have your partner lean to one side. Using the picture above let’s say she leans to your right side. You help steady her by holding her hip with your right hand. This will take her weight off her other leg and also give her room to bring that leg forward.
She will likely have her foot flat on the bed with her knee up so you can help steady her by holding her knee while she leans to your left side and brings her other leg forward. Now all you have to do is sit up and you are in position. Once you’ve done this a few times it is actually quite easy.
You could leave your legs out straight like they were in Cowgirl position, but you will likely find it more comfortable to bring your legs in and cross them like in the picture above. You should also notice with your legs crossed that your pelvises are aligned for deeper penetration.
Your partner might also feel more comfortable crossing her legs as well.
So now that you have settled into your new position you are ready to start thrusting your penis in and out. Or are you? You wiggle around a bit and find that penis movement is nearly impossible! So why did I waste your time getting you into this useless position???
Patience young man. Bear with me a few more moments and I’ll get you back into the action.
You are up close and face-to-face with your partner so get back into kissing, and stroking, and caressing her. This will begin to get the passion burning again and you may find yourselves gradually getting into a slow rocking motion to the rhythm of your kissing. As you are rocking you might begin to notice that your penis is moving slightly inside her.
Then as you continue gently rocking you will find that shifting around even slightly can put subtle pressures on her A-spot (remember the 1cm rule). You may find that wrapping your arms around her waist allows you to push a little deeper as you are rocking. I sometimes find that placing one or both of my hands on her lower back or bum and pulling her into me as I am rocking increases the contact with her A-spot.
This is a good example of “less is more” because the slight motion of your contact can have such a big effect on your partner. If you can get the contact and the rhythm right the tip of your penis rubbing against her A-spot is almost like a “deep penis massage”. I have seen some women enter into a trance-like state during Yab Yum and some have told me that they felt waves of orgasms passing through their entire bodies that lasted for several minutes. Does that sound like it’s worth trying now?
Yab Yum Variants
Ok I’ll be honest with you. The examples of Yab Yum I described above are mostly for slow sex, and I usually only begin with this variation then move on after my partner gets heated up. There are some much more intense (and also more energetic) variations of this position which mostly involve shifting so that I am sitting on the edge of the bed with my feet on the floor.
Note: I am struggling to find some good graphical representations of this variant, so I am having to make do with the images below and some careful explanations.
As much as possible I like to transition from one position (or variant) to the next without withdrawing my penis. So in the first Yab Yum example I transitioned into it from a cowgirl position with the result that we were in the middle of the bed. So now the challenge is to get you and your partner from the middle of the bed to the edge (without falling or injury).
Have your partner put her hands around your neck for support (like in the picture below), then you place your hands flat on the bed behind you and lift your bum off the bed (yes I know she is on top of you but you should be able to do it). Slide your bum as far as you can towards the edge of the bed (it will only be a few inches) then put your bum back down and shift your feet and hands so you can repeat.
This might sound challenging but I can generally get to the edge of the bed in 3-4 shifts. Once you get to the edge place your feet flat on the floor and adjust for maximum comfort. The image below is on a couch rather than a bed, but it closely matches Edge-of-the-Bed (EotB) Yab Yum. The difference is that the man would have his legs spread and would be sitting upright or leaning forward slightly.
Note: If your partner is new to this position she might be a bit uneasy about falling backward. But I find most ladies become more confident over time and it helps make them more confident if you try to keep one arm around their waste most of the time. (I haven’t dropped a lady doing this yet)
So now that you are “in position” what can you do? Well this EotB Yab Yum includes several minor variants and also offers the possibility for the man or woman (or both) to drive.
Let’s start with the first picture where the woman has her feet firmly planted flat on the bed. This is a more energetic variant allowing her to place most of her body weight onto your penis and grind on it. Your job is to carefully tilt your hips/pelvis to ensure the tip of your penis is firmly contacting her A-spot, and hopefully the shaft is contacting her G-spot, while your pubic bone presses on her clitoris Clitoris (the 3Gs). It helps if you put your hands on her hips or bum to help maintain 3G contact and help your partner to grind on you.
EotB Yab Yum can be very energetic (for both of you) and can produce orgasms of equal intensity to Cowgirl position. The amount of energy expended can be huge once you get moving and can leave you both soaked in sweat and panting for breath. But I often find that my arms become very tired from helping my partner to drive so I have developed a useful “cheat”.
I noticed that the bed tends to rock to the rhythm of our grinding motions so instead of using my hands and arms I use my feet to push back against the bed to the rhythm of my partner’s grinding. To do this your feet need to have a good grip on the floor, and the bed cannot slide easily as well. It sounds complicated when describing it but once you feel the bed rocking under you it is easy to push and relax, push and relax to the your partner’s rhythm. Basically it feels like you are bouncing on the bed, but you are doing it sideways instead of up-and-down.
Which leads into the next variation. I usually do the first variation until my partner has had one or more orgasms, and we are both struggling to catch our breath. Once we have recovered I have my partner put her feet out straight instead of flat on the bed, then I shift forward slightly until my bum is just barely on the edge of the bed. Then I open my legs a little bit wider which allows my partner to slide down just a little lower between my legs. It’s a bit like the picture below except that I am closer to the edge of the bed and my partner is not leaning backwards.
As she slides down between your legs slightly you should notice two things. The first is that the change in angle does not allow your penis to penetrate as deeply (so no A-spot contact). The second is that the new angle puts a lot of pressure on your partner’s G-spot from the base of your penis. Get your partner to put her hands around the back of your neck for support and then hold onto her hips and pull her tightly against you.
Now for the fun part. If you were able to figure out how to use your feet to drive the bed rocking then this is exactly what you need to do now. Use your feet to push (thrust) yourself against the bed about 1 or 2 inches, and at the same time allow your partner to slide away from you by relaxing your hands. Then relax your feet and allow the bed to “spring” you back to your starting position. You will find that your partner will automatically move toward you as the bed pushes you back without needing your hands to pull her in. It’s almost like a spring and takes very little energy.
As you get a feel for the rhythm you can start thrusting harder and faster and witness the results on your partner. The contact on her G-spot will be intense and she will likely be feeling some stimulation on her clitoris as well when your pubic mounds come into contact with each thrust. This is a great variation for you to let loose your inner beast and give your lady a proper vaginal pounding!
Note: At the beginning of this section I mentioned that Jack Hammering should mostly be avoided, but this is one position where it should not be a problem. The reason is that because of the angle you will not be reaching too deeply inside your partner’s vagina (unless you have a long penis), so there is not much risk of causing her pain. Also the thrusts typically only move the penis 1-2 inches. But as always you should be watching your partner closely for any signs of discomfort or pain and stop immediately if you suspect she is not enjoying herself.
Explore Yab Yum
The reason this is my favourite position is because it allows for so many possibilities by simply making slight adjustments to your body positions or alignments. These variations also complement the flow of energy at any given moment; from slowly cuddling, kissing, caressing, and rocking to frantically pounding and panting and everything in between.
This position is a constant discovery for me even when I am playing with a partner who has already experienced Yab Yum with me many times. This is because there is so much variety in how people’s bodies fit together that it is rarely the same experience twice.
I hope that you explore Yab Yum for yourself and that you (and your partner) find it as exciting and fulfilling as I do.
If you think any of my information is incorrect, or can be improved please do contact me. My sensual journey is far from over and I am always looking to learn new things, or improve/correct things I thought I knew.